Essay

If you ask most people if they believe in love at first sight their initial reaction would probably be, “no”. I was one of those people myself. During high school I met and dated many people. When you’re in high school the relationships are usually short and meaningless so you tend to have more of them. Though my relationships were never serious it didn’t keep me from wondering what a serious relationship would be like.
Like many people, I sometimes dreamt about finding true love. I would dream about where I would be when I found her, what she would look like, how many kids we would have, and what our lives would be like. Even though you dream about it, you never expect to find it until later in life. For me, that later in life has come at the age of 17. I think I have found the person I want to spend the rest of my life with. I found her at church.
I have attended the same church my entire life, College Hill Baptist Church. My Grandfather founded the church and served as pastor until his death. My Father is the pastor now and I will probably be called to take over some day. As for now, I am happy playing the drums each Sunday.
From where I sit at the drums I am able to see every member of the congregation as they enter the sanctuary on Sunday mornings. It’s usually the same people taking their same paths down the aisles to sit in the same pews they have for years and years. This is how I noticed her, it was one Sunday in December. She didn’t just rush to her usual seat, she was a visitor and didn’t have one. Instead, she stood in the door and carefully scanned the sanctuary to find a vacant spot on one of the pews. She stood out to me immediately. She was so different from the usual women who come through those doors.
I could tell that she was older and at that point I thought my dream was shattered. I told myself there was no way she was going to find interest in a 17 year old. She was mature, attractive, smart, well-dressed, and had all the characteristics that you would look for in your soul mate. Me, I was just a 17 year old high school senior who played football and the drums. I didn’t think I had anything to offer her. I couldn’t bring myself to say anything to her, but at the same time I wanted to know so much more about her. I didn’t even know if I would ever see her again because she was just visiting. Fate would have other plans.
Much to my surprise this woman became a regular attendee at church. It wasn’t long after that, she decided to join and become a member. I was so glad she decided to join, this would give me more time to figure out how I was going to approach her. I really didn’t have to think for long before everything started to fall into place.
My dad is always looking for ways outside of the church for the congregation to bond and be active in the community. As a result of this, my brother decided to enroll our church in a co-ed softball league. A co-ed league would give the men and women of the church to play the sport together and get to know each other as well as the members of the opposing churches. Being that this woman was so girly, I never would have imagined that she would sign up to play on the softball team but she did. I knew this would be the perfect opportunity for me to get to know more about her.
I can remember the very first game we had, it was actually an exhibition game and didn’t really count towards the tournament. I didn’t know if she would be there because she had only come to two of the many scheduled practices. Much to my surprise again, she shows up. It was sort of bad timing because I was in a relationship and my current girlfriend had come to watch me play. I really couldn’t pay her much attention because I was so intrigued by this older woman. We won one of the exhibition games and lost the other.
As the season went on and we played game after game, I would just observe her and take notice of everything that she did. This made me want to make her a part of my life. I loved everything about her, however I could never bring myself to discuss anything with her other than softball. I was so afraid of being rejected. Then another strange moment occurs in my favor.
Her sister, who is also a member of the church and the softball team had just moved into a new home and she and her husband requested the help of me and a few other people to help with the move. She wanted to take my number down so that she would be able to contact me when they were ready for the move, but she didn’t have a pen or a cell phone at the ball park. As we looked for a way for her to remember my number, her sister, the woman of my dreams walks by and she asks her to enter my number into her phone so that she could get it from her later. That was the turning point for everything.
The woman I’d been dreaming about sent me a text giving me her sisters number. Anytime someone sends you a text you then have their number as well. I was on cloud nine, I now had her number and didn’t even have to ask for it. I was one step closer to getting to know this woman, but was still afraid of rejection. I couldn’t take it anymore. I decided to text her and the wait for her to text back seemed like an eternity. The wait was over, she replied.
She wanted to know who I was, she didn’t have a clue as to who was texting her. I explained that it was me and immediately got to the point before she decided to ask me to never text her again. I asked her if I could ask her a question, she replied “sure”. I asked her if age was an issue when it came to her being in a relationship with someone. She replied, “no”. I knew that this was my opportunity to tell her how I felt. I’m glad I did, after a few round of texts we decided to become friends and get to know each other better.
After a short time, our friendship evolved into us having feelings for one another and we were both happy. However, there was an age difference between us that probably wouldn’t be acceptable to others so we decided to keep our relationship a secret. Like most secrets, it didn’t remain a secret for long. My mother ended up finding out as well as a few other people. I guess true love is hard to hide. My mother doesn’t feel that I have anything to offer her and wonders why she wants to be with me. She has told us both that we should not see each other anymore, but that’s easier said than done.
Turning off your feelings when you’re in love with someone would be as hard as trying to stop Niagara Falls from flowing, it’s just not that cut and dry. It would take years to dry up Niagara Falls and in some cases it takes years to get over someone you’re been in love with. I am in love and she is on love and though we have been forbidden to see each other we are just taking it one day at a time. We may never end up spending our future together or who knows we may spend the rest of our lives together. Only time will tell what the future holds and we are both going to be patient and wait on it.